From the Mormon Hatemail Bag….
Every once in a while I get empassioned emails from teenage Mormons who are very, very upset with me, solely because I write about Mormonism in a way that is not faith promoting.
These emails do not anger me. In fact, they sadden me. Ick. Just saying that, I think of all the Mormons who have written me and told me how sad I make them, but still, it does make me sad. It’s a sad-o-rama.
Annnyway, I got this comment on my blog yesterday.
ok, I have not read your book, but by the way you are talking you hate mormons. Why? Did we hurt you? Did you fell pain that a mormon gave you? I mean if so, geton with life people make mistakes i am sure they ae sorry but if not, why do you hate me? I am mormon, do you hate me? I find that being angry and writing and posting mean things about ones religion is rude and cruel and right now I am angry but I will calm down and read out of the Book of Mormon, I will pray and I will have peace. To you, I say you might think about reading the Book of Mormon and praying and by the way, I have a testimony of this chrch, a strong one at that. And I am not even in highschool yet and I know this church is true and I know it is the true church, the only true church.
First of all, I have to cite that little ditty always thrown at me. The one where they say, “Someone offended you, so you left. Remember, it’s not about the people, it’s about the Church.” Well, they are right. “It’s NOT about the people, dear, it’s the CHURCH.”
The saddest thing about this comment is that ONE DAY this teenager will be a LOT older, and it’s entirely possible she will be thinking for herself, and she will have to look back and CRINGE at the things she said.
I can still recite the “testimony” that was given to me as a child. “I know this Church is true. I know it’s the only true Church. I know that Joseph Smith was a prophet of God. I love my mom and dad. Yada yada yada. Nameofjesuschristamen.”
But the problem is, this TESTIMONY was never mine. It was handed to me by my parents, and my bishops, and my church leaders, and church teachers, but it never really belonged to me. I was not supposed to question it, or research it, or in any way validate that it was mine.
I was just TOLD that it was truth, and that was that. I was expected to accept it and spout it regularly, much like this girl did to me.
When I was fifteen, on one of the rare days when I didn’t skip Seminary class (It was held DURING school hours, in a building just off the public high school grounds. I believe kids STILL attend Seminary here in Utah, during their school day.) I asked the teacher why I couldn’t research other churches.
He told me that for someone like him, with a strong testimony, researching other churches would be fine. But with my weak testimony, it would be a very, very bad idea. I could be led astray.
And I never understand that. Surely, if it’s true, it would hold up to a little investigation?
But that is not the case. In reality, it doesn’t hold up, as has been proven by DNA evidence, and scholarly research, and the test of time. To be a believing Mormon, one must go on faith and faith alone. Read the Book of Mormon, pray, and wait for the burning of the bosom.
Whatever you do, do NOT research the BoM, or the LDS teachings. Just accept what you are taught. When the prophet speaks, the thinking has been done.
This has never been my way. And it is not the way of many, many others, who have left the LDS Church, but are still proudly counted as members. Perhaps one day, my teenage friend will look back and think, “Wow, did I really write that comment? I am so embarassed. I am so saddened by what I believed to be true, and the sheer arrogance that it took for ME, a teenage girl, to write a 43-year-old woman and tell her JUST how wrong she was.”
Or maybe not. Some people never do look back and wonder at their arrogance. But I know I did. I remember that I wanted to put up a picture of the LDS Temple in my college apartment, and didn’t really understand why my Greek roommate was offended. The picture was a gift from my parents, who of course, were trying to keep me in line. Moving away from them, I could now make my own choices about my birth religion. They could no longer control what I heard, or saw, or when I went to church. So they gave me the temple to remind me about the testimony they had also given me. I suppose the reason I left it behind was because it never belonged to me.
Now, of course, I understand why my roommate was upset about the picture, and did not want it on our living room wall. I often cringe that even as I was questioning, and wondering, and preparing to leave, I was still so arrogant, as trained from birth, to believe I had the only true thing, that I did not understand what respect is.
Perhaps the reason I keep getting birthday cookies and visits from the Mormons, and why they will not take my name off their records, is my payback for the arrogance of my youth, although in my defense, that was also given to me.
There is an inherent lack of respect Mormons show for other religions and belief systems. Baptizing dead people into the your religion is the EPITOME of arrogance. And yet they feel, “Who WOULDN’T want to be Mormon? After all, it is the only true church.”
It’s a mindset that has no signs of going away.
February 20th, 2006 at 1:25 pm
Once you move away from Utah the suffocating presence of the Momos all but disappears. Other than seeing the twin space ships (Momo temple) on I-5 and reading your blog, they don’t exist anymore. Occasionally I’ll see two guys on bikes dressed in cheap, black suits pedaling along the roadway. I always think of Ivory soap, Jell-O salad and weeping testimonies. It is such a treat to be able to open the door and know the ward teachers aren’t going to be standing there. There are just some people that shouldn’t be at your door; Momos, Jehovah Witnesses, cops and the Fuller Brush man. With the exception of the cop, feel free to answer the door NAKED. It won’t stop them but it’s fun anyway.
Inthenameofthysonjesuschristamen!
February 20th, 2006 at 3:18 pm
LOL…although I am an adult in my thirties, I think this is exactly how I first approached you…I believe a scathing post about me also ensued. I have however, taken the time to really read and think about a lot of the things you have to say. In a lot of cases I agree with you. In a lot of cases I disagree. I do however appreciate the things you give me to think about.
I very strongly believe that there are a lot of LDS members out there that are complete sheep that cannot think for themselves. I also believe that there are a lot of LDS members out there that are not like that (that are deeply thinking and less likely to succumb to “mormon culture” and the follow the leader mentality). I like to think that I am not a mormon drone…actually, I know I am not like that as I apparently frustrate LDS members to the extreme most often than not.
Oh and btw…my birthday greeting (that you may or may not have received by email) was certainly not my way of trying to get you to come back to church…LOL…I hope you didn’t take it that way!
Keep up the great blogging.
K.
February 20th, 2006 at 3:21 pm
Howy you are too good. But I must not be looking when I drive up I-5, because the only spires I can remember seeing were in Boise, and boy what a shocker that is. The local LDS church (I dont’ think) sports them, but darn I will now have to go look.
Natalie, I am so happy to not be standing in your shoes. Most people who email me (even hate mail) know how to proof read and spell. Plus I don’t (as the above alludes to) live in Utah, Mormons are much more relaxed here, a different breed (althought they do a lot,) but then again maybe Mucketies (secretly) don’t count them as true Mormons.
February 20th, 2006 at 7:13 pm
Kris and I actually did get off to a rather rocky start, but wouldn’t ya know it? She stuck around, and I listened, and well, we discovered we aren’t all that different.
I hope I wasn’t scathing about this girl. Truthfully, I do remember what it was like to feel this way.
February 21st, 2006 at 10:57 am
Cele,
The two towers, I believe, are Flash Gordon rocket ships just waiting to take the chosen to the next comet that passes. It’s the Momo temple just off Interstate 5 in La Jolla, CA.
Obrotherwherearen’tthouHowy
February 22nd, 2006 at 9:48 am
Yo Natalie…..you say it just like it is girl. Never fear people because “Jesus does want you for a sunBEAM to shine for him each day”…..and soon POPCORN WILL BE POPPING ON THE APRICOT TREES. Got my name off those records 15 yrs ago. What a good feelin. The minute I am on an airplane and up in the air I get this feeling that someone untied a rope from around my neck. There is just this cloud that floats over Zion that makes a born and raised Utahn feel trapped. It is hard to explain unless you have felt it. I think that kids in Utah drink in high school, do the sex thang and get in trouble just because they are sick of being told how to live their lives from the day they are born. NO ONE is old enough at age 8 or even age 21 to say they belong to THE ONLY TRUE CHURCH. YES the LDS church is an organization of arrogance and big $$$$. Their men take it upon themselves to be the judge of every member. JUST DON’T ASK ANY QUESTIONS. BaaBaaBaa
Hey now they have proclaimed that their members are fat. Now we will have those sisters not only on anti-depressants…..they will be mixing them with diet pills in their diet pepsi. Put that all together with a Suburban full of kids all under the age of 5 ……HELP….hurry draw that zion curtain!!!!!!!
February 23rd, 2006 at 9:16 am
This is a great Blog! It’s great therapy to read your Blog Natalie and to read the comments of others that feel the same as I do about the Mormon Church.
I admire you for being able to live there.
Having moved away from “..Utah we love thee…” in 1982, I could never move back. I love visiting my family, and skiing at Alta, biking in MOAB etc., but I don’t like being surrounded, er, smothered, by the Mormon church influence day in and day out.
I have a comment for Kris. I stayed a momo for years and ignored the weird stuff like polygamy, faithful members eventually becoming Gods themselves et. till it got to a point where I felt the teachings of the church were so incongruent with what I believed about God that I just had to quit.
Thanks for yer comments ya’ll
Del
February 23rd, 2006 at 10:25 pm
“I know it’s true, I know it’s true, I know it’s true….”
My family has been ripped apart by this mantra, and it truly turns my stomach every time I hear it.
Speaking of Saints, Nat, you are a saint to be so gracious to the misguided and brainwashed. I read your book, and your grace shined through there, as well.
February 24th, 2006 at 10:21 pm
Ohandblessthisfoodthatitwillnourishandstrengthourbodiesanddousthegoodweneedmaywegohomeinsafetyinthenameofjesuschristamen………..BORING….NOT SINCERE….SAME OL SAME OL…..NO BRAINER. Just LIKE WATCHING A SOAP…ONE CAN MISS GOING TO THE MO CHURCH FOR 10 YEARS THEN GO THERE FOR SOME REASON….FUNERAL….WEDDING…..NOTHING EVER CHANGES. My fav was fast Sun. What they talkin about FAST….that sucker went on for hours. I swear that place must own WONDER bread also!!!!Put yur shoulder to the wheel push along….do yur duty with a heart full of song….lalala
February 27th, 2006 at 3:43 pm
Del, thanks for the comment…the fact of the matter is that I do not ignore things like those you mentioned. I guess they don’t bother me as much as other people who have felt the need to leave the church; I have talked about my views between “church and gospel” before and am not going to do another pass. I am glad you found your peace by peaving the church, I choose not to leave the church and I don’t believe that makes me any less of a person than anyone else. It still intrigues me though how many people just cannot accept that others choose to stay and the intolerance against them.
K.
February 27th, 2006 at 4:26 pm
Hello Natalie,
I like your post and your comment. I don’t sense any arrogance there and that’s great. Your comments on LDS remind me of other religions. Most, I believe, are like the Mormons in believing that they are the only ones with the truth and THE solution.
Was passing through your site. Thanks for the agent list.
Great day to you!
Clay Duval
February 28th, 2006 at 9:07 am
Kris,
I wholeheartedly agree that staying in the mormon church does not make you any less of a person. What I think is really cool is that you are a thinking person who makes up her own mind and doesn’t follow the “brethren” blindly (3 blind mice?).
Also, I wanted to give you a little moral support by letting you know that others have stayed in the church for years and years and learned to focus on the Gospel/God, not on the church. I just left the mormon church 2 years ago. My 30th anniversery of returning (honorably) from a a 2 year mormon mission was last month.
Del
February 28th, 2006 at 11:46 am
Hi - I just happened onto this site via links from others, and I have to say that as a former Jehovah’s Witness, I can completely relate to your experience. Some of the doctrines may be different, but the elitist attitude and insidious brainwashing is exactly the same, as is immoral and victimizing covering up of crimes by the church heirarchy. The two groups have much in common - including that darned doorbell ringing!
Good job on your site and good luck with your writing career!
February 28th, 2006 at 3:32 pm
Del, I appreciate your comments, thank you. Hehe…3 blind mice…*wink*
K.
February 28th, 2006 at 7:50 pm
Thanks to all for the comments on this post. I found it very fascinating. Great comments from all sides. And welcome to all the new visitors like Rebecca and Clay.
Watch for an updated agent listing coming soon.
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September 20th, 2007 at 4:04 am
My wife and I are Christians, and we have a dear Mormon friend. She is very zealous about her beliefs, and for that I can admire her, but I cannot believe the same way. I have a problem with God, once being a man, then exalting himself to that position as God. If that is the case, who or which God, created the heavens and the earth, and man himself. And I never bought into our Saviour Jesus, being a brother of Satans, since Satan, who was Lucifer, an angel was a created being, who rebelled, and yes, tried to exalt himself above, who? GOD!…there are many things I can not buy into. And I have experienced the arrogance of Mormons who call us “so called Christians>” Even our friend has referred to us like that in conversation. And I never understood this thing about “investigation of the church”…it sounds so vulgar and anyway, I believe that Christ died for us, and we are saved by grace through faith. And once you are saved, your fruit in changing of your life, is to be seen, in working for the Kingdom of God. But it isn’t works, that earns you salvation. You cannot earn it..It is the free gift of God.
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October 5th, 2008 at 1:21 pm
Oh yes, devil, I am SO dumb I never considered a captcha. Of course. No true content? Please. You are no ex-Mormon. And I’ve heard worse. Sticks and stones and all that.
October 5th, 2008 at 2:33 pm
Natalie, I’m sorry you’re getting a headache. But we love your blog. Smart people that is (including Todd, who is my kind of Mormon- i.e. tolerant).
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If I may…
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October 5th, 2008 at 8:46 pm
LOL. Azteclady, Devil’s an idiot, and probably someone who has dogged me before. Just put him in ignore. It’ll drive him crazy. It’s what I intend to do.
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October 6th, 2008 at 12:15 am
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I know Devil is trying to say something, but I don’t have my umin and thummim, so I guess it’s all reformed Egyptian to me.
October 6th, 2008 at 6:59 am
Still here…
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For a long time i have held my story in and i agree on everything you have said its all true.
i do feel sorry for that little girl. if your still in it after 18 its too late your basically brainwashed by then.
thanks for the blog its a lifetime of release.
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[…] Trapped by the Mormons » Blog Archive » From the Mormon Hatemail Bag…. – Every once in a while I get empassioned emails from teenage Mormons who are very, very upset with me, solely because I write about Mormonism in a way that is not faith promoting. These emails do not anger me. In fact, they sadden me. … […]
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June 3rd, 2010 at 2:34 am
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